pro cra sti nat ing

youtube is a black hole in which a grad student can get inadvertantly get lost in for two hours while trying to leave her apartment to study. f*ck. but, i'm all caught up on the best of the daily show. still, it would have been nice to finish the readings for conflict resolution. *sigh*

tipping point?

here's another one for you, aja, to inspire more faith in public democrats. (via Andrew Sullivan, who, by the way, did not appear to have posted anything on the clinton/wallace segment... hmmm.)

best dream ever.

a couple of weeks ago i attended the revenge of the bookeaters benefit at the beacon theatre with a friend. famous people in attendance were jon stewart, that guy who plays the PC on the apple commercials everybody hates but me, sarah vowell, sufjan stevens, and, of course, dave eggers, who founded the tutoring service, 826nyc.

last night, i had a dream that i attended another bookeaters benefit with my family, and this time, the special guests were steve jobs and samuel jackson, who didn't censor himself one mothafuckin bit. after the show, we were in our car about to drive away when we spotted mr. jackson doing an interview on the sidewalk. i pushed my brother, mark, out of the car to solicit an autograph, and he managed to actually get samuel l. to get in our car and shoot the sh*t. he signed my ticket with a long note about doing things that matter.

i was incredibly disappointed to wake up this morning and not have the autographed ticket clenched in my paws, but the first thing i did this morning was to sign up as a volunteer for 826nyc, the tutoring service in brooklyn. i mean, it seemed like a sign from sammy, himself: "Whether or not what we experienced was an According to Hoyle miracle is insignificant. What is significant is that I felt the touch of God. God got involved."

now, i know you are all thinking: "lord, kristine did not even last a week of doing nothing after quitting her internship." but, for all you skeptics out there, i've been wanting to do it ever since attending the benefit... the only thing stopping me was that i was working 20-40 hours a week at my internship. now that i have my mornings and afternoons free, i have no excuse.

plus, i'm thrilled that i'll be visiting the superhero supply store on a regular basis. anyone in desperate need of secret identity kit or a standard superhero cape, let me know.

manhattan water torture and more stories.

i came home to my nyc studio to the sound of rain in my kitchen. i don't know wtf goes on upstairs when i visit dc, but this is the second time in four months that i've returned to a waterlogged apartment. good thing i only use my kitchen for storage during the school year. i had to don my gumboots and open up an umbrella in order to get a fork for dinner. true story. sal, the super, is on the job.

***

paul: "can you come down for grey's anatomy premiere - only 9 days. EEEEEEEEEE!!!"

the answer to that question at 9 days was a resounding "uh, no, i'm not coming down to dc for the premiere of a television show." seven days later, after six all-nighters, i decided that my life needed a little silly sponteneity and an escape from new york. the fact that aja was making the trip up from virginee sealed the deal, and off i went after work on wednesday for what came to be known as reliving the "good times we never had." for me, i'm used to having the crew in attendance (aja, paul, alex, and co.) whenever i'm in for the weekend... so nothing seemed to have changed. it was an evening of premieres: the office, grey's anatomy, and then six degrees... i forget how fun it is to watch tv with your own personal peanut gallery. it sure beats rushing home after your 9pm class to catch the last 15 minutes of your favorite shows by yourself.

(digression: the term peanut gallery does not have anything to do with the peanuts gang. i'm a little saddened by this factoid, as i always have a mental picture of charlie brown and co. whenever that phrase is used.)

***

there is a vegan burrito cart on the corner of K and 15th, pedro and vinny's, that i am absolutely fiending right now. i would appreciate anyone in the dc metro area sending one to me in packed ice overnight express, asap. mango salsa please. no refried beans.

***

going from a relaxed house party in dc to the delancey in the lower east side was a bit of a culture shock. i'm not one to wait in line to pay for overpriced liquor and bad dancing... get me to a pubbery instead. ah, new york... when are we going to fall in love again? this is like the last days of a very drawn-out breakup... everyone is on edge and no one wants to say anything about it. i need a few good fall days, sitting in a cafe getting my learn on, some walks in central park, and a dry kitchen. maybe there will be a renaissance. michigan, tuck, and darden are looking reeaalllyyy good right now.

last day before the rest of my life.

friends, i did the unthinkable. i quasi-quit my internship. yes... after feeling tremendously underappreciated for the work i've done (mainly, revamping the entire community investment index and benchmarking not just sectors, but subsectors, for standard and best-in-class CI initiatives), i've decided... i'd much rather be just a student, and nothing more, for the first time ever since sophomore year of college. i don't know why, but for some reason, i like to stress myself out by having a gazillion and one things hanging over my head. for once, i'm going to sit back and breathe. if i can do that, even for a month, i can say that i have accomplished something.

oh, should i qualify the quasi-? basically, i didn't throw down my security card and storm out of the building crying "exploitation"! i simply said that my schedule could not accomodate 20-hour weeks of work endentured servitude (it really can't... i have about 3 or 4 20-page papers due this semester!) and then, because i couldn't help myself, i added, guiltily, that i would not leave them hanging on the database i promised to build for them. thus, i would work remotely, up to five hours a week and not a second more, and deliver the said-database at the end of the semester. if not sooner. okay, technically, i'm still an intern... a freelancing intern. but i can't express how much i'm going to enjoy not having to come into the office. and, sadly, i actually really love tinkering with microsoft access... so it won't really be work. it'll be play.

i'm motivated to devote more time to school, in part, by the fact that my classes are so effin' awesome this semester, and i want to really spend time getting into the readings and preparing for class. i'm pretty much done with my snore-core (okay, really, only about 3 of the 8 were boring) and now have a schedule full of uber-fun electives from the adult learning program. adult learning is a fascinating field, and as someone who might have a career as an adult learner (j.k.) i love learning about how i learn. (how meta, ce n'est pa?) i already have very exciting posts planned about some class material (i know y'all are on the edge of your respective seats). and can i just mention that my strategy professor is mr. big's doppleganger? that's one sure way to capture my attention. don't worry, i'll behave myself. (apparently, i'm too old for scandal).

overheard.

on elie's roof, sunset on sunday:

kristine: so i googled you, and did you know that the only web presence you have is on my blog?
elie: well, that's as "elie." if you look under "andrew," he does much better for himself.
kristine: *gasp* what could be better than the cheeky monkey???
elie: (looks at watch) death of a friendship: 7:43pm

***

on the phone:

becca-boo: kristine, i don't like any man that's not head-over-heels in love with you.

(everybody now: "awwwwwwwwwwww!")

***

(while playing pool... as retold by mark)

joey: it's just too hard.
mark: that's what your girlfriend told me last night

(oh snap... and yes, that's my brother, mark)

superman wears jack bauer pajamas

jack bauer saved the world five times. each time, it only took him 24 hours. you would think, in that same amount of time, i would be able to rate 900 companies on 12 parameters, and still have time left over to make a power point.

there's no excuse. i'm a disgrace to humanity.

***

jack, btw, is my new caffeine. i can't seem to study unless he's in the background kicking ass and taking names.

beware!

woe be the cockroach that wanders into my abode. it will meet a painful death... suffocated, first, by an unending spray of lysol, then flushed into a watery grave. why lysol? because i keep forgetting to pick up insecticide.

a thank you.

i've been so busy this last month that i didn't realize a significant anniversary had come and gone: the two-year anniversary of the Break-Up, also known as my two-year anniversary of being single (which is subsequently followed, in october, by the two-year anniversary of my move to new york city).

i think about the Break-Up when autumn comes to new york (and it's officially here), because that's how my memories feel: overcast... and damp from crying. when you're down in the trenches, it doesn't seem like you'll ever crawl back out. for me, getting over my relationship meant changing everything: where i was, who i was with, what i was doing... danny left and i dealt with it by turning my life on its head.

to be clear, i don't revisit those times to wallow... i actually look back to revel in how much has changed since then... and how going through all that was probably one of the best things to happen to me. ever. when i was finally liberated (against my will, mind you), i was jolted into action, chasing opportunities with new fervor and a healthy amount of selfishness. though, truth be told, a lot of things i did to simply distract myself from the pain. i picked up and moved to new york. i decided i wanted to try out publishing, and so i did it. then i decided that grad school was next, and so it was. i had conversations with myself about what i wanted to do and then i tried to make them happen. i can't imagine the outcome would have been the same, or even close, if danny and i were still together. it's odd how things work out... even when they don't--and i sometimes feel like thanking danny for ending things between us.

i do know that i didn't do it all by myself. so, some props and some thanks. the first person, i remember, who helped me up was my brother, mark (a new reader of the cheeky monkey--hi mark!) who told me that it was okay to pick up and start something new. just because it was abrupt didn't mean i was a quitter. (so, thanks marky-mokong-ho-nito...) then, of course, there was kaye, who stayed up with me to make my list of things i hated about men and listened to me bawl and rant. and, elie, who made it his mission to make new york city my home. he hosted me for my interviews and took me in when i was homeless. he let me just be sad when i needed to be sad, but coaxed me out every so often to have a good time. thanks eli-o...

and, of course, all my very dear friends: moosh, paul, wolka, becca-boo, slomo, lola, pat, falgu, ly, bo, paolilla, priya, ethan, blobel, julie, and of course, my parents... who called, visited, emailed to check in and make sure i was okay. it really takes a village to get someone out of a slump... and i know that not everyone has that, so i was really really really lucky. you all have my heart.

what the problem really is.

*courtesy of dreamy todd:

it's 5am. do you know where your kristine is?

well, she wasn't tucked in bed slumbering away. she was off traipsing through mid-town in the rain, decked out in pajamas and galooshes, a la carrie bradshaw, circa season 4. i didn't have the hot, furniture-making boyfriend in tow, but what i did have was one sad mac. or maybe i was the sad mac? there i was, burning the midnight oil, when suddenly my computer started acting out. first it would just freeze... multiple times... the little browser arrow would disappear and i'd have to reboot and restart. argh... i spent about an hour just redoing work that i had lost. oh, and muttering to myself and my computer in a lot of very angry, inappropriate tones. apparently, you shouldn't talk back to your mac because just as i was about to save all my work, i heard the ZZZZzzzzhoooooo (the sound of life draining from your computer) and the screen went blank. all i could do was stare, gape-mouthed and incredulous (and betrayed). and i couldn't turn it back on. luckily i had my wits about me and didn't throw it down and stomp on it. WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!in times of a 5am computer-related crisis, there is usually very little you can do but cry... luckily for me, though, there was steve jobs and his 24-hour apple store on the corner of 5th and 59th, which is where i was at exactly 5:13 in the morning. SO... to answer your question paul, about what apple is like in the wee hours of the morn, well, its incredibly fun. in fact, its my new favorite after-hours place. at first, i was a belligerant customer... i rushed down the winding staircase, demanded to be helped, and then had yet another "meet the parents" moment when i was asked: "well, do you have an appointment?" um, its 5:00 in the morning. there is one other person here... are you kidding me? (picture me looking around the expansive and empty floor room, just ready to launch into a tirade about customer service)

they weren't kidding. but this isn't the airline... or time warner cable... or tmobile. this is apple... and i really shouldn't have doubted. the don't call it the genius bar for nothing. it's really like a bar. you sit on these stools, and the bartender... the genius on the other side of the bar (who really is a genius and not one of those posers on best buy's geek squad) offers up both technical and emotional support. and boy was i needing a whole lotta both. i'm sure during the day, the genius bar is manned by equally competant people.... but at night, or rather, early early early in the morning, you get the characters who, like you, love computers at all hour of the day and probably have a blood-caffeine levels that are illegal in 46 states. these people are fun (i mean, i'm one of 'em, right?). after they put my boo on life-support and assured me that my crisis would be averted, it was like hanging out at any other bar in chelsea (you get my drift?). except a lot of it was geeky computer talk: i learned about this cool feature called retrievr which helps you look up fotos on flickr based on what they look like. i learned that there is a secret world within my ibook that only a person who knows the secret buttons to push can access. and i sheepishly had to admit that i don't back my sh*t up, which no one has any excuse for since now everybody knows to back up thanks to sex and the city. so i learned that i can back stuff up on my ipod.

i left apple at 5:45 am the way every customer should... placated, pleased, with a fully functioning laptop, and a smile on my face. oh, and an invitation to come dancing and play with light sabers this friday at the mac house. thank you ryan for repairing my computer and my sanity. xoxo.

amen.

i wonder if women all over the world are applauding this as a step in the right direction. i certainly am. its about time that we stopped looking at exposed sternums, ribcages, and spinal columns as hallmarks of beauty.

on a related note... i gained ten pounds while i was home... and you know, i kind of like my softer, rounder self. though, i'm sad that i'm not really fitting into my designer jeans.

attrition rate.

in december, i was going to apply to seven business schools.
in june, i was going to apply to five business schools.
in august, i was going to apply to four business schools.

now, i'm seriously considering only applying to two business schools: columbia and michigan. and, to be honest, i frequently toy with the idea of only applying to columbia.

but, in the interest of keeping an open mind, my final choices for first round application are columbia, michigan, virginia, and dartmouth. to answer your question, aja, i'll be down in virginia the first weekend in october, and i should be travelling up to new hampshire the third week in october.

it's not so much that i'm half-hearted about these programs, because--gosh darnit--i would be lucky to get into any of them. i'm more concerned about completing about 16 essays in the next month (on top of school and my internship). and i'm also concerned about my self-esteem in the very likely probability that i get dinged by all of them (such is life when you apply to schools with an average 14 percent acceptance rate... oy)

after the party is the after-party...

paul's weekend visits are becoming more and more epic. witness the last 24 hours of whirlwind kristine/paul time:

breakfast at prune in the lower east side, which serves an amazingly simple but surprisingly delicious brunch, complete with pete's coffee... paul's own personal favorite brew. i had the soft scrambled eggs... paul had the pulled pork sandwich. well worth the commute downtown.

pounding the pavement in soho included a trip to robert marc to repair paul's sunglasses, which inexplicably disintegrated in front of prune, american apparel where i invested in the requisite hipster attire for my frequent evenings out in the east village, and campers shoe store for a pair of smart/comfortable work shoes.

i still can't believe we left the 5th avenue apple store empty handed. unfortunately, they didn't have the headphones i needed and i couldn't fit one of the mac book pros into my purse. oh well.

dinner plans were made at bombay talkie, with cafeteria as a back up. couldn't get reservations until 10:30, but left the apartment at 9:00 dressed to the nines to check out therapy, a very cool bar in hell's kitchen i wanted to try out based on a friend's recommendation and the fact that the drink menu includes tasty delights such as "pavlov's dog" and "ying-yang"--mine and paul's drinks, respectively. by the time we finished our cocktails it was 11:30! (i think i had more than one drink, actually) i was smashed, we were both hungry, and we had less than 30 minutes to get our butts to the west village, grab dinner, and join paul's friends for some booty shakin' at mixx lounge. (not our usual flavor, but paul's friend's friend knew someone who knew someone who was having a birthday party... you all know the story.)

after that, the highlights include:

-me getting picked up by a lesbian at the pizza joint. she was 48 and thought i was adorable. i was drunk, hungry, and flattered.
-cupcakes at mixx lounge!!! this should be a requirement for every bar. i'm sure others will agree with me.
-i've been itching to dance to jt's sexyback and christina's ain't no other man. i got my wish.
-a round of petron can extend the evening an extra hour or two.
-some guy was upset over a misunderstanding about my relationship with paul. he poured beer on my head. i'm not kidding. he said something about being pissed that i left him on the dance floor. i'm still mad at him. *growl*/*glare*
-a post-party/anti-hangover meal at french roast to close out the evening with soup and hummus before heading to bed at 5:30am.

***

we're going to have a hard time topping that evening when paul comes back in october... but the fact that i managed to get us tickets to scissor sisters (yah, who's your mama?) will help our cause quite a bit.

ugh.

i started reading a million little pieces over christmas break '05, and just could not get into it... i thought the writing was awful and cheesy and overwhelmingly pretentious. i remember throwing the book down and growling to my sister about how unbelievable the characters were and the dialogue was and that it was a lot 'o hokey bullsh*t. (god, i wish i could find my copy so i could give you some of the toe-curling examples) it actually made me angry to read it, but i'm stubborn about finishing books. mind you, this is before everyone knew the book was a fabrication... so either i've got a finely tuned bs-radar or i'm an insensitive asshole. anyways, i was less than surprised when the whole scandal broke on the smoking gun just weeks later. i shrugged, no longer felt committed to reading more of the drivel and moved on.

i guess where i'm going with this is that i don't completely understand the whole consumer fraud lawsuit concerning the book. i suppose it has to do, in part, with the fact that i never got emotionally invested in james frey. i didn't turn the last page, put the book down and think "wow, that was so powerful..." maybe if i had cried real tears for james, like oprah did, i might have felt violated to find out is was all a lie. here's the thing though, if you enjoyed the book and it moved you, how much does it really matter, in the final analysis, if it's fiction or non-fiction? can you really retroactively say that you didn't like it? "it was an amazing non-fiction story, but as fiction it doesn't work for me." if you were inspired or entertained, you still got your money's worth, right?

if you want a really moving story about alcoholism, read augusten burrough's dry.

overheard.

on the uptown 1 train:

kristine: uh-oh. i have a craving coming on. i don't know what i'm craving... but i'm craving... something. i hate it when this happens.
elie: of all the versions of kristine... and you know i love all of them... the PMS kristine is my favorite. she's the version that would swim all the way to italy for the perfect amaretto cookie... just because she's craving one.

***

on the phone:

priya: when i look back on college, i don't think about it in terms of semesters or years, but on what you were binging on at the time. there was the smart food popcorn phase, the cosi phase, the cream cheese on a toasted raisin bagel from rendezvous phase...
kristine: don't forget the nutella crepes.
priya: that wasn't a phase, that was a lifestyle.

newsfeed

so what's going on with me? i know you're all at the edge of your seat waiting for my next post. hold on to your seat, here i go!

fresh meat: school has started and we're the big kids on campus! sweet. just got back from the consulting club's bbq and there are some cute newbies in the house. unfortunately, i have a "no interdepartmental" dating policy. but its always fun to browse.

michigan v. columbia: before there was new york, there was ann arbor... which is a major, major selling point for the ross school of business. so huge, that i was thisclose to scrapping my original plans to apply to columbia early. i wanted to have the option of going to michigan if i got in. luckily, cooler heads prevailed and the bottom line is: i just need to get in somewhere (anywhere) and i'll be happy.

gmat: i got a solid, though not exceptional score. but now i know what i need to work on, and i'll be retaking the test september 29th... until then, quantitative problem sets until i turn blue!

school: classes started yesterday, and i have a pretty good schedule. got all the classes i want and then some. fundamentals of conflict resolution... how adults learn... strategy development as a learning process in organizations... workplace learning institute (two seminars)... and, lastly, transformative learning (my online class). i love the online class format, because, well, i'm a web junkie and a night owl. also, the blogosphere has been very very quiet of late and i need something else to check on obsessively.

comedy of errors: that's dating in new york for you. here's the update: despite the fact that the boy and i only went on two dates, i left my zoolander dvd at his apartment, which now has to be returned to me via a mutual friend. i feel like i'm on divorce court or something. actually, i can honestly say, without hubris, that the whole thing could be an episode of grey's anatomy. speaking of which... only two more weeks... yay!!!

paul: is coming to nyc for the weekend! yay!

work: a deadline looms in the distance. why do i feel like i have three full time jobs? wait, its because i do! i hate my propensity to bite off more than i can chew. but, work is exciting as i'm creating benchmarks for our community investment index and the work is substantive and analytical. i miss the summertime. *sigh*

disclaimer: if i am m.i.a. in the next few weeks, apologies in advance. but even though i don't pick up the phone or write you back an email, or answer the door when your ring the bell, you'll always find a little sumthin sumthin here at the cheeky monkey.