it's 5am. do you know where your kristine is?

well, she wasn't tucked in bed slumbering away. she was off traipsing through mid-town in the rain, decked out in pajamas and galooshes, a la carrie bradshaw, circa season 4. i didn't have the hot, furniture-making boyfriend in tow, but what i did have was one sad mac. or maybe i was the sad mac? there i was, burning the midnight oil, when suddenly my computer started acting out. first it would just freeze... multiple times... the little browser arrow would disappear and i'd have to reboot and restart. argh... i spent about an hour just redoing work that i had lost. oh, and muttering to myself and my computer in a lot of very angry, inappropriate tones. apparently, you shouldn't talk back to your mac because just as i was about to save all my work, i heard the ZZZZzzzzhoooooo (the sound of life draining from your computer) and the screen went blank. all i could do was stare, gape-mouthed and incredulous (and betrayed). and i couldn't turn it back on. luckily i had my wits about me and didn't throw it down and stomp on it. WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!in times of a 5am computer-related crisis, there is usually very little you can do but cry... luckily for me, though, there was steve jobs and his 24-hour apple store on the corner of 5th and 59th, which is where i was at exactly 5:13 in the morning. SO... to answer your question paul, about what apple is like in the wee hours of the morn, well, its incredibly fun. in fact, its my new favorite after-hours place. at first, i was a belligerant customer... i rushed down the winding staircase, demanded to be helped, and then had yet another "meet the parents" moment when i was asked: "well, do you have an appointment?" um, its 5:00 in the morning. there is one other person here... are you kidding me? (picture me looking around the expansive and empty floor room, just ready to launch into a tirade about customer service)

they weren't kidding. but this isn't the airline... or time warner cable... or tmobile. this is apple... and i really shouldn't have doubted. the don't call it the genius bar for nothing. it's really like a bar. you sit on these stools, and the bartender... the genius on the other side of the bar (who really is a genius and not one of those posers on best buy's geek squad) offers up both technical and emotional support. and boy was i needing a whole lotta both. i'm sure during the day, the genius bar is manned by equally competant people.... but at night, or rather, early early early in the morning, you get the characters who, like you, love computers at all hour of the day and probably have a blood-caffeine levels that are illegal in 46 states. these people are fun (i mean, i'm one of 'em, right?). after they put my boo on life-support and assured me that my crisis would be averted, it was like hanging out at any other bar in chelsea (you get my drift?). except a lot of it was geeky computer talk: i learned about this cool feature called retrievr which helps you look up fotos on flickr based on what they look like. i learned that there is a secret world within my ibook that only a person who knows the secret buttons to push can access. and i sheepishly had to admit that i don't back my sh*t up, which no one has any excuse for since now everybody knows to back up thanks to sex and the city. so i learned that i can back stuff up on my ipod.

i left apple at 5:45 am the way every customer should... placated, pleased, with a fully functioning laptop, and a smile on my face. oh, and an invitation to come dancing and play with light sabers this friday at the mac house. thank you ryan for repairing my computer and my sanity. xoxo.